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Saturday, 6 February 2016

Trading with the Arabs, by Peter Morford

“As I write this page it is 6 days since I saw The Son,” I emailed to my Chairman. He would know what I meant.
          When he was in England, The Son, Sheikh Ibn ben Mohammed, could have passed for a well-tanned Englishman, in his Saville Row suit, bowler hat and English manners. Six days ago he had been my dinner guest at the Savoy Grill. And, because he was drinking my wine we were on Ben and Jerry terms. To have discussed business during a meal would have been unmannerly.
          As we sipped his port he wanted my guidance on the matter of casinos and nightclubs and “Where are the prettiest women for the right price?”
          “I thought you’d been here often enough to know,” I said.  He lit his cigar.  The head waiter whispered into his ear and, with reluctance, we went out for a walk in the Embankment Gardens.
          At last it was time for business. “I am not authorized to sign the contract with your company,” he said. “My father, Crown Prince Frazel, has the final decision. We must meet again in Dihary. I will fly back tomorrow and request an audience for Monday next. Will ten o’clock suit you?”
           “Can I be sure that your father will keep the appointment?”
          He smiled. “Of course, Jerry. I will call him now – if you will excuse me,” he said as he took out his cell phone.

On Sunday afternoon I touched down at the peaceful Dihary Airport. From my suite I phoned Mohammed to invite him for a non-alcoholic drink. “I cannot come now, Mr Conway,” he said “but my father will see us at ten tomorrow as arranged. Please be punctual.”  The Sheikh was in his formal mode.
          The next morning I arrived in good time. A receptionist in a burkha took me to a waiting area and offered me coffee, cakes and a pile of English papers. 
          At ten nobody had called for me, I checked with the burkha. “Later, but soon,” she said.
          I returned to my computer, keeping in touch with my London Office.  At one o’clock the burkha came to me.  “You are invited to lunch. Follow me please.” She led me to a table by the window so that I could admire my most recent project; a ninety storey tower.  Our next building would bring even more glory to the Kingdom.   
          Meanwhile the Siduas have their own concept of time.  As buyers they always keep the seller waiting. I finished a leisurely meal and returned to my computer. At 4 o’clock Burkha came over to me and said, “Sheikh Mohammed and Crown Prince Frazel will see you in the morning at 10am.”  No apology.
          Nobody came from Tuesday to Friday, when the secretary told me, “Monday morning at 10…please.” Was there a smile in those dark eyes?
          All this time I had no word from Ben, sorry, Mohammed.  I had called his mobile – no connection- and his office was clearly instructed not to put me through.  Had we lost the contract? My Chairman was getting restive when he skyped me.
          “Don’t worry Sir George. They need this deal more than we do. All they’re doing is showing a bit of Muslim contempt for the infidel.  I’m patient because I’ll get it in the end,” I said.

On the second Monday morning I decided to give them some of their own medicine.  I arrived at 11 and was asked to wait. I settled down to coffee and The Times.
          At 12.45 Sheikh Mohammed came in, wearing a djellaba and  head-dress. We certainly were not on Ben and Gerry terms.
          “Good morning, Mr. Conway. The Crown Prince is ready to meet you and discuss the contract. We will go to the palace at 2 o’clock. You will be my guest for lunch.”
          Afterwards we drove to the palace. It was 2.45 but Mohammed was unconcerned.
          “My father will be here soon,” he said.
          “Perhaps,” I said as his entourage came into the room and a different burkha lady brought in more coffee. The old man stopped before me and bowed formally.
          “I am honoured to welcome you to my humble tent, Mr Conway. You will take coffee with me?                                                                             

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